It’s Funny What You Learn About Other People’s Children When You’re Involved In Facebook

Yep, surely half of my kids are going to lose the “friends” they have on their facebooks after many read this, but so be it, most of those people I wouldn’t let my kids hang out with anyway.  I’m shocked at what these kids say and how they act and the things they divulge.  We have a rule in our house.  If you are my child and you are allowed to have a facebook, I have the password and your user name and I’m on there often.  Do any of you “parents” monitor facebook at all anymore?  Actually, I know a lot of you do … we talk about the kids whose parents don’t.  We talk about the parents whose kids act like imbeciles.  As you now know, I monitor EVERYTHING, which means if your kid is friends with my kid, I know a lot about your child and with they way they act, probably a lot more than you.  Unfortunately, I’m not impressed.

It seems its become acceptable to raise a bunch of whining, cussing, unkind, drug using, alcohol abusing, bullying,  philandering thieves who have nothing better to do than divulge their every move, their every thought, their every … everything.  And, well it’s sort of embarrasing … for them and for you.

Let’s take a sneak peak at some posts just today, shall we:  “tbh i think you can get any guys like so fuck fast:)” (16 years old) …  “Great party, great c-bus, makes sex so much better” (16 years old) … “Bitch gonna dick hop, hop on over heya” (15 years old) … “Imma tap tht hot” (12 years old) …

I could go on and on and on, but it makes me want to gag.  Of course, there are some kids who stand out as nice, kind, smart, above the influence kids.  Those are the kids my kids are permitted to hang out with.  Those are the parents I respect.

How is that so many  of the kids, dare I say the majority, at the high school are druggies/stoners?  How is it that you don’t know your high schoolers and middle schoolers are having sex?   I know, how can you not know?  It’s like the Columbine massacre.  How could those parents not have known their kids had an arsenal in their rooms?  How is that your kid is on facebook posting nasty, mean, cruel, disgusting, personal things and they still have a facebook?  That shiot would be deleted so fast if any of my kids acted the way many of yours do.  I can’t be the only mom on there, monitoring my own child, to keep him/her safe, am I?  Other moms see how grotesque your child acts, is there no shame any more?  Have we really become a society in which the Village is raising the kids, so the Village is to blame?  If that’s the case, I’m glad as hell I bailed outta the Village.

Good luck to all your kids, they are sure as heck going to need it.  Technology is amazing, no doubt, but in the hands of unparented kids, kids with no guidance, no mentors, its a treacherous and possibly dangerous thing.  How bout you get off your lazy butts and check in on what they are doing every now and then?  I mean, really, do you think being a parent is merely chauffeuring your kids from one place to another, dropping them off and picking them up?  Do you think parenting is buying your kids laptops and computers, cell phones and ipods?  Buying their love? Parenting is involvement.  It’s coaching and supporting, it’s talking and listening, it’s guiding and loving, providing and raising.  It’s not going through the motions … it’s being the lever of the motions.

We just spent 15 minutes deleting some not-so-great kids off our friends lists.  If you think I look at you funny the next time we run into each other, it’s because I’m less than impressed with the job you’ve done as a parent. You might think others are impressed with your car or your home … but, nope, what we all are really thinking is you SUCK as a parent, and unfortunately, your kids are just like you.  Is that harsh?  I really don’t think so, cuz if you don’t succeed in raising good, kind, caring, moral kids, what are you good at?  Facebook is a great place to find out who people really are, because we just let loose on there.  You can either send a positive message, like so many, or you can send a negative message, like so many.  Kids do not inherently understand this.  They need to be taught … as with all things.

 

33 Comments

  • Yes! I wish more parents would parent their kids, it would make my life easier. Great post, we dropped out of the Village as well. It was filled with trash.

  • Thank you for posting this. Had to talk you know who out of throwing some verbal punches. I told her she’s better than that. I was shocked to see the bratty little girls throwing around such nastiness, who come from such “nice” families. It was the second confirmation today that I am doing the right thing!

    • Ha Ha … no surprise for me, or K. Good thing for big K bc then the apologies starting coming in via txt, phone, email, message. If these kids just had a little direction, a little guidance they’d be fine. Bratty, sure, but at least when its pointed out that they are being total jerks, they back pedal. I’m so thankful that we homeschool, because in the end the only people that matter AT ALL are your family!!! xoxoxo

  • Well said Susie,

    I am shocked so many times at what I see and read on facebook that I refuse to let Holly have her own account. OK she is only 9 yrs old but that doesn’t mean anything these days, she is more than capable of “running” an account on there.

    I agree 100% with you that it is the parents fault for not keeping an eye on their own children, after all, would these same parents drop their kids off at a pub/bar (with no rules) with a fist full of dollars and expect them to be safe until they returned to pick them up? Facebook is no different, you don’t know who is reading these posts or replying, pretending to be someone they are not or gathering details about where they hang out, what they do etc.

    I applaud you for 1) keeping a loving eye on your children and 2) for having the strength of character to act and to tell others how it is! I just wish more parents could see the world as you do.

    Big hugs to all

    Ian 🙂

    • Thanks Ian!!!! I’ve watched this phenomenon for so long, it is amazing to me how many people simply believe their kids can raise themselves. Drop them off here, drop them off there, buy them everything their little hearts desire — all in the name of parenting. I feel bad for these kids, they have no guidance. =( They really are making complete fools of themselves and don’t even realize it. I know 9 year old with Facebooks, Ian, so good job for knowing it’s not a good place for Holly. kenny is begging for one … HELL NO!!! =0

  • I am 16 ( I live here) and I wish more parents knew what was going on with their kids. It is so sad for me to see so many friends smoking pot before, after and during school. I barely have any friends anymore because I can’t go to parties, I won’t drink or do pot and I can’t skip class. I hate this. Parents just don’t know what their kids are doing and it is hurting my friends. I used a fake name, but a real email, please don’t show my email. PS – My parents love your Youtube videos and your blog. I guess you think like them. LOL.

    • Awwww, sweetie, we know what you are talking about. Stand tall, hold onto your grown-up sensibilities and don’t fall to peer pressure, you’re so much better than that. Great that you have amazing parents … in today’s world that means you are so lucky!!! God Bless you and your family!!! xoxoxo

  • You need to get this in front of as many parents as possible. It’s a travesty what passes as parenting these days. I’m going to forward this to as many people as I can. God Bless you and your family.

    • Thank you very much, I appreciate your sharing it. and you’re right, while I don’t ever claim to be perfect, I try my damnest!! =0

  • Thank you so much for posting this. I’ve been “discussing” with my daughter the ills of the web and she is fighting me at every step as I try to maintain control of the social media. This was just what I needed to put my foot down and tell her its my way or no way at all.

  • Well, I posted on ur personal fb, I posted on KelloggShow’s fb and now here I am posting on ur site. I absolutely love this the more I read it. I keep going back and I agree more and more. Just wanted you to know I think you are amazing, I think you’re talented, that you have really great insight and that I love you all. {hugs and love} Kelly

  • I’m slightly puzzled by the overwhelming response in support of this opinion. While the writing is quite good, the opinion is flawed. There is such a thing as privacy and individualism even in youth and to insist your child make his facebook password public to you is reprehensible. My son and daughter, have journals, facebook pages, myspace pages, and many other social outlets and that is theirs and theirs alone. To suggest that I am less than as a mother because I don’t hover is offensive and irresponsible. Where does one find the time to 1) have a job, 2) carpool to and from sporting events, 3) cook and clean, 4) help with homework and 5) troll facebook? I do enjoy your families videos and such. Happy Holidays.

    • I have to disagree. Privacy and journalism is a diary next to the bed that is NOT shared with other people.
      Anything they do on the computer is free for mom and dad to manage, the end. It is our job as parents to filter out what they do online and be responsible adults for our youth who have not yet learned what is and is not appropriate to do.
      Parents who look at their kids as their friends and talk to them like their best buddies and ‘respect’ their child’s right to have a license at 15 and go do whatever they want unchaperoned, have unmonitored facebook accounts, and have a sexual relationship because… well they have feelings *too* end up with children who do not respect them, overstep their boundaries and sneak behind their parents back. I knew them all growing up. Their parents had no flipping clue the things they were doing when they were out being ‘responsible kids’.
      Children need boundaries and they need to learn early on that we are not there to be their friend but we are there to help raise them into functioning adults. So well, I’ll step off my soap box but I feel very strongly about this.
      This isn’t about stunting your child’s creativity or voice. But Social applications is not a right and it’s downright dangerous for kids unmonitored.

  • OMG thank you. My husband and I have been arguing and he was thinking our 14 year old deserved, had a right to, privacy. Thanks for this blog, he gets it now.

  • I couldn’t have asked for a better blog at a better time. You always offer excellent guidance, going straight away to the point for easy understanding and it typically seems to be something I need to hear. Merry Christmas

  • Serious stuff.
    I totally agree, I mean really?
    and I quote: “Where does one find the time to 1) have a job, 2) carpool to and from sporting events, 3) cook and clean, 4) help with homework and 5) troll facebook?”
    Parents find the time, parents who care find the time, and really, overseeing your kids social interactions takes very little time and isn’t “trolling” it’s parenting.
    My niece blocked her parents on facebook, but she still has her laptop and iphone… It makes me want to scream!

    • Kids need parental supervision, guidance, love and support. So many of our kids today are growing up way too fast, I wish more parents would love being parents …

  • I’m debating if any of my kids will ever HAVE a Facebook, or Myspace account… or even a cell phone with video/photo privileges. At the moment they can all expect to not have any of these things while under my roof. If they *do* need a cell phone, for example, going to college or being out etc as teens… they get the ugliest piece of trash looking phone with minimal capabilities there is. 😀 Because… Im mom and I can do this. They will thank us later.

    • Because your a mom and it’s your God given duty to do so!! =0 I allow it, but I monitor it … it’s an incredible insight into their “friends”!!! =0

  • It’s like you were reading my mind. Your blog is so exciting, I read you were publishing a book, I’m sure it will be an equally great read. I’ll definitely be back. Merry Christmas

    • With all the facebook hoopla over that dads video, I hope more parents will wake up to the fact that good kids don’t just grow themselves.

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