Sneak Peak: SEX! It’s What’s For Dinner …

A Little Preview from my book: M.I.L.F. (Mom I’d Like To Flatter) … Chapter 10 … SEX! =0 All critiques, comments, suggestions, offers to publish, etc are welcome! =0

Sex is what will maintain blissful relations between you and your spouse. When it comes to sex with your husband or wife two words suffice: Do It! Men are sexual beings, and by nature are grumpy shits if they don’t have sex regularly. If you want a husband who does the dishes, changes diapers, brings home flowers, draws you a hot bath, gives you massages — in a sentence, if you want a husband who treats you like a queen, then you need to give him the sexual gratification he needs. Men are extremely simple beings. They need sex, food and sleep. In that order. They are happy and congenial if they have had all 3, they are cranky shit heads if they haven’t. Perhaps this sounds childish? Perhaps this sounds manipulative, unfair and exceptionally sexist, to you? But guess what? Women, you too are sexual tigresses. You need to be sexually gratified as well. It’s a stress reliever, it’s a work-out, but best of all, it feels so damn good! If you and your spouse Never say NO then you both will be getting exactly what you want and what you need. And your children will have two very happy and content parents. This is the Get Rich Quick marriage counsel. Overnight you will see results. And yes, I mean Never Ever say no. No matter how tired, stressed, rundown, overworked, underpaid, unappreciated you feel, you always eagerly and excitedly accept the advances and indulge in a little booty.

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19 Comments

  1. says: Lee South

    Awesome, this coming from a man…however I hope this chapter ends in the word Booty, if so I will buy the book!

  2. says: Lee South

    Also, please remember to include the following footnote in this chapter “*This method does work great to keep your marriage alive and well, but keep in mind you can end up with 11 kids!” 😛

    1. says: susie

      HA HA HA HA Seriously? Lee, how many couples do you know that practice abstinence as birth control??? =0 My mom is under the firm belief that we’ve done “IT” exactly 11 times!! ha ha

  3. says: Meredith

    True. My mother’s advice to me on my marriage, exactly. Never say never. Sex was a very positive part of my marriage and never an issue.

  4. says: Sandy

    Everyone listen to Susie, she knows what she’s talking about.
    If the sex isn’t great practice until it is, and don’t be afraid to try new things. It keeps the dream alive. Pretty sure I’ll buy your book, even if every chapter ends with booty 🙂
    You and Dan have what 90% of couples want but will never achieve, Susie – a true partnership!

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