Sneak Preview: DayCare … Moms Must Stay Home and Dads Must Man Up

Poverty-level pay. Fifty-hour work weeks. High exposure to illnesses. No health insurance. No benefits. No sick days, No Personal Days, No Paid-Vacation Days. No bonus package, no retirement fund and No respect … No, I’m not talking about us stay at home moms, I’m describing the typical daycare providers work environment!

I’m old school, no-one can raise my children better than me because no-one cares more about them than I. No-one will be empathetic and place my baby’s needs ahead of the others in a daycare center. Your 6 week old’s cries are no more important than any of the other infants in the room. And with 4 babies and 2 “teachers” the odds are 50/50 that your precious child will be tended to immediately. They have other infants who need to be changed or fed. In daycare your child’s minimal needs are being met. They are changed and fed. They are not nurtured and adored, they are not the axis on which the world spins. This is not only the case of sheer numbers, but mostly because the adults aren’t invested in your child. You pay them what is socially acceptable, which is crap, and bemoan the cost at every turn. Obama wants to make childcare deductible up to $12k/yr while giving absolutely nothing to the mom’s who sacrifice a second income to love, nurture and raise their own children. Why? Because there is an entire movement brewing to entice women to give up their control and influence over their children to the state. Preschool now starts at 2, kids are farmed to all day kindergarten, all in the name of socialization. Wake Up!

I don’t want to hear the age old argument that you can’t afford to stay home, that your husband simply doesn’t make enough money to allow you that luxury. Listen ladies, Dan & I are living proof that any family can afford it if you get your priorities straight. We started out with nothing, absolutely nothing. Still today we are driving 11 year old vehicles, we don’t have the newest kitchen, or the most beautiful furnishings, but we have the best kids because we made them our priority. Let me tell you sisters, if your man is not making enough money to support his family, he is not a man, it’s that simple. You married a child, a boy and now your children will pay the price. But don’t come looking to us and our tax dollars to pay for your luxuries.

Seriously, if you can’t afford to pay the current pathetically low cost of daycare, then honey, your job just isn’t worth the time you spend away from your children. That may be hard to swallow. You may have spent what equals a lifetime in school getting your degree. Years. Maybe decades working your way up to your particular position. And now you are faced with some jobless nobody (moi) telling you to ditch all that hard work, that none of it was worth it. What’s more important? Your job? Your child? Which would you lay your life down for if necessary? …

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31 Comments

    • Hey Sue, I have known you for many years and for that reason I just felt that I had to respond to your view of daycare/preschool. I have thought a long time on this response, I just had to being that I am a preschool teacher and home daycare provider. I am not defending the fact that there are places out there that will not be 100% attentive to your kids, but there are alot that are. I Am blessed to be home with my children and work as well. I am more than capable of giving a child within my care the tenderness and love that I give my own children. Yes it may not be the exact same but it is still there. Yes being home with our children is the best thing but for those who choose or feel that they need to work I will gladly be happy to nurture them while they are at work. I have always felt that I was chosen to be a person you could put your trust in to take care of your child. This was not my orignal path I had set out for myself over 20 years ago but this is the path that the Lord has shown me. I enjoy the wonderment in a child when the discover the goo between there fingers or the butterfly on the flower, it does not matter if it is my own little one or that of some one else. It is always so amazing to see the excitment and joy of the earth that the Lord gave us through a childs eye. I am proud to be a home daycare provider that also teaches your children. Yes children are pushed more and more but at my home they are nurtured at there own pace, yes they are introduced to letters and shapes and colors but in the way of nature and fun not behind a desk rigid like.

      thanks Good luck with your book! I will have to read it all the way through it will be interesting reading and I am sure a topic of many discussions in many households!

      • Hey Veronica!!! I maintain that there is no-one in the world — not even yourself — who can take the place of a mom in her own children’s lives. No doubt you are an amazing care giver, nurturing and empathetic, but my kids were given to me by God to care for and there is no-one more suited to do so than I and this fact holds true for ALL moms. xoxox

        • Sue

          I agree that God gaves us our children, I am just stating that for those who feel they need to work then, I and some very great other people, are willing to love & nurture the children that need the care while their parents work. Heck being home with my children is my most favorite thing to do!That is why I do. Remember you were really the very first person I ever left my Dulcinea with..when Brian had surgery. I was so not wanting to leave her but at the time I felt knew it would not be fair for her to be locked up at a hospital all day. of course now I know we just improvise and take things with us..amazing how things change in just a few short ears. Anyway my point being that I knew how well you would care for her. Yes not the same as me but I knew you would be fair with her and you were. Hard to believe that was about10 years ago. I think being home is the best thing and I agree with you in that I just think that sometime daycare gets a bad rap is all. We are not all like some of those depicted in the “Daddy Daycare” movie.

          • Albeit there might be a few mothers who need to work because their husbands have passed away, or they screwed up and married the wrong guy and so they got divorced, but I’m willing to wager a bet that the majority of women who work have bought into the feminist movement and feel compelled to work in order to have the nice cars, the nice clothes, the kids in the private schools. I am morally opposed, on the basis of my Catholic Religion, to daycare. That is what family is for, to fill in the gaps should mom have an extenuating circumstance. I could not provide daycare services for anyone because I believe God grew the family so that mom’s stay home and dad’s bring in the money and provide for their families If the men can’t do this without the assistance of their wives, they are children and ought not be married with children. Old School? yes. Unpopular view? yes. You should watch the CitadelCatholicMedia, your eyes will be wide with awe.

            BTW, love this family, the KelloggShow is my top Youtube channel, my top vlog and we hail all the way from Maine!

            Pax Christi,
            Ellen

  • I agree, our society is falling apart, families are giving their children to the school districts or private schools (thinking this is better) to raise. Full Day Preschool? Full Day Kindergarten? This was unheard of in my day and now look at the kids we are raising. Teen girls are getting pregnant, drugs are in every home, violence, complete anarchy. We need to regroup, we need to get our priorities straight and stop handing over ourselves to the welfare state. You young people can rasie your own children, how do I know? Because I could. Good to see youngsters with a set of values, your family is to be commended!

    • I hated school from the get-go. I was sent too early, pushed too soon. We are all in such a rush to see our kids grow up and so afraid they may fall behind the societal schedule. Montessori, Waldorf, they all say chill … I agree. =0 And thanks so much for your kind words!! =0

  • I can take care of myself. Wish we all had the money you apparently have. We are scraping two pennies together each month and barely make all our bills so yeah, we should get a break on daycare. We aren’t rich, why should a few people have everything while we work hard and get nothing? I also don’t know how you spend all day with your kids without going crazy, but I drive mine as crazy as they drive me. They love school.

    • ” We aren’t rich, why should a few people have everything while we work hard and get nothing?” — because it’s their hard work that is making them rich … your version of hardwork may not be as profitable or valuable … why should you take what is not yours? You wanna split what you make with me? Your kids wanna share their A’s with kids who make D’s??

      • Still do Mama, still do! Not here for a long time, but I’m here for a fun time … single moms are the problem, unless their husbands died, which is typically not the case. And if moms are married, their husbands carry the burden of supporting the family … we are a prime example!!! It’s not what you have, it’s what’s you do. MHO — you’d HATE my book. When it’s published, do NOT buy it!! =0 lol

  • You are so wise for being so young, my grand-daughter watches your show on YouTube every day and she has me hooked. Your family is not only beautiful, but God-centered. Most parents look back on their parenting with regrets, I have a good feeling this will not happen to you. God Bless, my dear.

    • Eileen you are so kind, thank you!! What is your grand-daughter’s name? We will mention her in 2moro’s show! =0 Blessings to you and yours as well!

  • There are one million excuses anyone can come up with, to justify not being moms first, but at the end of the day, only one thing matters and that’s your family. We are such a selfish nation. Love seeing people my age say eff you to the man! You guys are the best.

  • I wish I had this wisdom when I was younger and my children were at home, instead everyone around me was filling my head with the nonsense that I was less of a person if I didn’t have a career. You will help so many moms, I so hope your book is published.

  • YOu gyys are such an inspiration. I just had a long talk with my husband after reading this and did some amth and you are absolutely right, I (Cathy) do not make enough money to justify daycare, because no amount of money can rep;lace the years I am losing with them. All last night I was riddled with guilt, but I’m looking at the time I am recovering with them over the next 13 years and that is a wonderful thing. Thank you so much. Shocking it took a blog by the kelloggshow, but I really am fascinated by your family and you are great role models.

    • Omsh, that makes me so happy. I am so happy for you, for your kids and your family!!! Wow, to think we were able to help someone make such a great change … I can’t tell you how thankful I am that you told me this!!! Best Wishes to you!!! oxoxoxox

    • Sorry, daycare is socialization and education and it is the village. Would love to look into your real world, bet you pay your kids to smile for the camera. My girls can’t wait to go to school and they are only two. They would go crazy if they were at home with me everyday. Wake up lady, do what’s right for your kids.

      • I was reviewing some of the kellogg blogs and came across this comment about them paying their kids to smile..so wrong you are. This family is exactly what is depicted. I have known the Kelloggs for almost 12 years now. Sue and I may disagree with the whole daycare view..as I am a daycare provider for families that struggle to make those ends meet, but she is one great momma and her decision to home school her kids..I am right there with her. I have 6 children (one in college, three home schooled and one in public school and a 2 year old as well) I truly believe that Sue and Dan have done a great job with their children and they do not have to pay the kids to be a certain way on camera.

      • Oh yea and one more thing Sue is awake and doing exactly what is right for her kids..she is giving them a good foundation so they will succeed in life! Going to public school or daycare is not right for every child/family. Only you as parents can decide what is right.

  • Yes, yes, yes – If moms just did what their hearts tell them instead of what they think is expected of them, the world’s children would be better for it!

  • The first step is marrying someone committed to this mindset. Without a partner with the right priorities, life goes to shit fast.

  • I wish every mom could stay home with their little ones. We had nothing when we had ours that were 13 months apart. We didn’t have insurance, medicaid, food stamps, HUD, family help–nothing. My husband earned $82 a week (34 years ago) and we lived on it. We both had our Master’s degrees, his in Bible and mine in business. I could have gotten a job immediately out of college with a big oil company; however, we decided our kids were more important. We at a lot of mac and cheese and cheap hot dogs. We used a lot a coupons. Our kids had a lot of garage sale toys and clothes. We had nothing new forever and ever. We had each other. I don’t regret any of it. When they were a little older, my husband and I got our teaching certificates. Our first school was one that we could all walk to together. Kindergarten and first grade were just across the hall from my classroom and right down the hall from dad’s classroom. I dreamt of a time when things would be different and they finally are. My babies are now 33 and 34 years old and I don’t resent a minute of the life we had. Nobody cares for your kids like you do.

  • Where is the dislike button for this statement. People should not speak of what they do not know. Very upset that our society still has single minded views. This is a very negative and hurtful statement to all moms out there that have to work. Having to leave a baby and go to work is not what any parent wants to do but when it means making sure there is food on the table and a roof over their head, survival is more important. Not every man can have a top paying job there just is not enough of those to go around. Have you not been in touch with the real world or what. Hello massive layoffs, huge decrease in pay for those who had to start over. I know families who have gone through this and now both parents work just to pay the bills. I view your statement as bullying your words have hurt many moms who struggle every day to put their babies in daycare so they can provide for their families. This was the first time I looked at your site and I thought wow what an interesting family I wish I could get rid of my debt and do this. After reading this and hearing the cruelty of your words and your view on the families who have two working parents I will not be back. I pity you for not being able to see others views or the pain they go through to make such a decision. You are very lucky to not have to make that decision you should not rub it in other’s faces and tell them they are horrible for the decisions they have made. Do not judge what you do not know of.

    • Oh Brandi, if only you knew. The choices we’ve had to make, the hardships we’ve endured, the lack of vehicles, etc. If you read the FAQ’s and the About Us, you’ll see we made it work way back when Dan was making a mere $9k/yr! We chose our kids from the get-go, which means we do without all the wonderful things like granite countertops and vacations and new or even used cars … life is a choice and you do what you want to do — it is that simple!

  • Personally, I DON”T CARE HOW YOU DO IT! My wife and I are very happy with the way that we care for our kids. They are well fed, educated, clothed, and taught very good values. One value we teach is how to not gloat about the way your life has turned out because you didn’t do things like everyone else, just to drum up fame for your family and try to make a name for yourself. My wife has a great job that she loves, AND it contributes to society. I can claim the same for myself. If the only thing you have to contribute is more kids and a narrow minded, out of date point of view, then I say congratulations! YOU are part of the problem!

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